I Must Break You – Marianne Kane

For those new to the series, make sure to check out Nadine Brown and Nia Shanks attempt to send me to the great beyond.

In each release, I’ll be performing a new workout designed by some of the world’s best trainers and strength coaches in an attempt to…well, break me. This is just a way to add some variety and fun to my sessions (and give you something to laugh/cringe at) while giving all of you Sexified readers out there some ideas to inject into your own workouts every now and then.

Today’s entry is brought to you by the amazingly awesome Marianne “The Pain” Kane.

Marianne is the owner and creator of MyoMytv, a website that provides free workouts for time crunched humans using a variety of bodyweight and kettlebell exercises, with a hefty dose of inspiration from her own life sprinkled throughout. I went through the archives and chose this lovely gem of a workout to test drive, so peep it:

Complete 3 separate rounds of the following 10 exercises. After each round, complete the “Bridging Combo”. Use a 15 second on/45 second rest interval for all the exercises.

Thruster into Reverse Lunge (right)
Thruster into Reverse Lunge (left)
Double KB Suitcase Deadlift Burpee
Jump Rope
Super Plank Climber
Two-Handed Swing
Renegade Row
Stand-Kneel-Stand (right)
Stand-Kneel-Stand (left)
Roundabout Swings

Bridging Combo
Sub-Max Pull Ups
Alternating Single-Leg Hip Thrusts x 20 (10 each leg)

This workout was made infinitely more enjoyable thanks to the help of my friends Nick Moore and Sohee Lee, who I somehow convinced to share in the pain for me Well, that and the short work interval. 

For the first two rounds, things went pretty well (aside from a falling over like a Goof Troop) on the Renegade Rows. During the 3rd round though, Nick and his sick, infinite wisdom decided to change the breakdown from 15/45 to 20/20 – a minor adjustment, but enough to cause me to hate life just a bit more.

My jump rope skills are pretty much non-existent to opted to use my invisible rope for this session since it would be more entertaining than watching me get 1 jump in 15 seconds while managing to snag Nick & Sohee up in my rope…actually that would’ve been much more entertaining – noted.

Like all good workouts should, this one ended in a lovely human front squat.

While this workout was a challenge, I scaled back on the weight I used (16kg & 20kg) since I rarely do kettlebell exercises and wanted to make sure I didn’t break myself prematurely. With that said, the rest intervals will make or break this one – had we bumped it up to 30/30 for all of the rounds, Marianne may ended up pouring out some liquor for her 3 fallen homies.

Status: Unbroken

Next week will conclude the first season of I Must Break You, featuring an apocalyptic workout from fat loss expert, Lady Leigh Peele.

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Comments

  1. Nancy C. says

    Either you’re getting better at this or the workouts are getting easier. I’m sure Leigh will make you go 1 for 4 at the end of the day.

    I kid but I admire you terribly. You have big brass clankin’ ones to do this challenge.

  2. Wendy says

    Nice job, guys…but I think you took the easy route ‘cos it’s supposed to be 15 seconds of REST and 45 seconds of WORK. I think THAT will break you! :)

    Cheers,
    Wendy

  3. AQ says

    I can’t tell if you did 15 seconds rest with 45 seconds effort or vice versa. 20/20 would be more than a minor adjustment in that case…

    • AQ says

      Yup, so apparently I can’t read. You did 15s effort with 45s rest. Marianne’s workouts are flipped – short rest, long effort.

        • AQ says

          During my 15 sec rest intervals I’m gasping for air between slugs of water. All y’all looked way too chipper during your breaks. Something was amiss! I look forward to your second attempt. I’m most certainly enjoying your I MUST BREAK YOU challenges from other trainers. Keep ‘em coming!

  4. Jeff says

    Hi Rog, I been following Marianne for a while. She would NEVER do, 15 on and 45 off. Pretty sure it is 45 on and 15 off – very very big difference. Pretty sure it’s just a communication error. Have fun with 45 on.

    • says

      More like a reading comprehension on my part…oh man, this saddens me.

      This would be the part of the movie where the hero realizes the quest isn’t complete when he thought it was and has to go back in for more action.

      Definitely looking forward to doing this workout again the right way. You can have my stuff when I die.

  5. Marianne says

    I was wondering why you were all standing about having a full-blown conversation after those evil thuster/lunge combos! They kill ME, so you should not be able to string an unbroken sentence together. You probably got 1 rep done in 15 secs!

    And I was also wondering how 20/20 could be worse?? I was very confused Rog, especially at the “unbroken” status …

    I call for a repeat performance … at either 45 effort/15 rest OR, be kind to yourself and do 40 effort/20 rest! You’ll be glad of that extra 5 seconds, let me tell ya ;)

    *evil laugh*

    • says

      Sweet baby Jesus…if this kills YOU then I’m most certainly going to the great beyond.

      Yes m’am, I will do it again soon and for now will update the status to unbroken with an asterisk!

  6. Jeff says

    Marianne, could have been worse, you could have given your ‘Evil Jumps’ as well.
    Unbroken ;) Funny ;) – give him ‘evil jumps’

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