Men: Can Fitness Supercharge Your Sex Life?

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Image courtesy of Fred Johnson: https://www.flickr.com/photos/fredjohnson

 

Invest in your fitness and your sex life will improve dramatically.

It sounds like the biggest duh moment in the history of humanity, doesn’t it? Of course it will be better: you’re stronger, leaner, have rock hard abs and more stamina. You’ve just achieved the holy grail of sex appeal.

Not necessarily.

While these are nice additions, they’re far from necessary and aren’t close to the actual character traits that – in unison with these features – will drive your woman wild, connecting you two on an entirely new and meaningful level.

And these are traits that you can practice and develop daily, on your own, in less than 45 minutes.

  1. Commitment

With all that we have on our plates, taking care of our physical health is never convenient; there’s always something else that you could be doing. Then again, showing up for our woman fully in the relationship (and in the bedroom) isn’t always convenient, either.”

It would be easy, maybe even understandable, to let our physical health fall by the wayside of other responsibilities, to put in occasional effort here or there and pat ourselves on the back. But this small degree of effort only leads to mediocrity, and deep down inside you know you want more than the meager results it offers, and that she wants much more from you and of you.

What we commit to grows. What we commit to commands our full attention, focus and energy, and the things that we once thought were so important begin to fall lower on our priority list.

Your woman needs your complete commitment to be able to fully open to you. Even if you aren’t consciously aware of it, her Spider-Sense notices when you aren’t providing it, and over time this will serve as a barrier to your intimacy.

Choose a strength training program that’s appropriate for your current fitness level and commit to it fully for the next 12 weeks. From this day forward, like breathing, it is something that you unequivocally do. Create a backup plan for when obstacles get in the way, and then create a backup plan for that backup plan.

During these 12 weeks, it’s less about crushing it and more about flexing your commitment muscles, becoming a man who prioritizes and grows through his commitments.

  1. Connection

To connect fully with her, you must first connect fully with yourself.

The gym, or wherever you are building your body, is the ultimate training ground for self-discovery. It gives you the chance to get out of your own logical head and into your body.

Feel how your body responds as you grind out the last repetition of your set – did you have more in your tank?

Observe that sensation in your gut as your body fatigues mid-workout – does it make you want to dig deep or to call it quits?

The best things in life must be felt, not philosophized.

Would you trust with your goals a personal trainer who had never trained a client or exercised effectively in his life? Or a professed surgeon who only took a quick look at Yahoo Answers before opening up your chest?

Your body is your tool and it is your responsibility to understand it well, as a knight knows his blade. The more in tune you are with all of its inner workings, the more connected you can be to hers.

  1. Presence & Intention

Millions of people around the world watched Michael Jordan play basketball because they knew from the moment that he stepped onto the court that this was not a game.

He wasn’t thinking about what his momma ate for dinner, nor how many thousands of dollars he just made in the last few minutes from Air Jordan sales. Every thought and movement was intensely directed towards a single objective; fully in the moment, he responded intuitively to the ever-changing landscape, wasting not an ounce of movement.

He didn’t come merely to win – he played like he was saving the world (and thus Space Jam was a biopic).

Are you fully in the moment when making love to your woman, able to sense what she needs and giving it to her even before she even knows that she does?

Or are you distracted, thinking about the argument you had with your boss, or mentally drafting your next tweet?

You can either tweet, or you can fuck – pick which one is more important.

When you’re at the gym, you’re at the gym. Leave your phone and any distractions in the car and immerse yourself in your sessions, over time developing the same immersion with your lady.

  1. Passion

When was the last time that you truly ravished your woman? I’m talking lifting her out of the shower, throwing her over your shoulder and lovingly, passionately, bending her over the kitchen counter kind of sex?

Society tames us to a large degree, dulling our edges for the sake of group cohesion, but the bedroom (or backseat), the intimate space for you and your partner, is the last place that you want to be civilized – it’s not in your basic nature to be.

That desire to give all you’ve got to your woman springs from the same part of you that would risk your life to protect her from harm. The woman wants to surrender to you and to the direction you provide – but only she trusts that you can handle it all.

Don’t waltz your way through your gym sessions. Bring intensity to each repetition no matter how tired you are. Don’t worry, it won’t kill you. In fact, through strength training, you are literally overcoming resistance with every push and pull, identifying your weaknesses and bolstering your strengths with decisive action.

Each time you grab the weight, you’re slightly better than you were before.

She wants the passionate, unbridled animal inside of you. The lion that snuggles and is affectionate with his lioness is the same creature that’s capable of fighting tooth and nail anything that would bring harm to her and their cubs.

By approaching your workouts in the manner laid out above, in due time you will develop the ability to give her just that.

Fat Loss & Muscle Building Supplements

Dear fantastic and loyal reader,I get a lot of email about which supplements are great for muscle building and fat loss. In person, once people find out what I do for a living, I get asked even more (so now I tell them I’m a janitor).I’ve got nothing but love for you, so when you read this please hear it from that place of love.

Fuck supplements. Fuck them right in their silly asses.

Imagine that your body is a car, whatever your glorious mind can conjure up (mine is Speed Racer’s Mach 5).

You know the body, wheels, breaks, engine, pedals, doors, windows, ignition, and anything else required for a car to actually run and not suck? In your body, this is represented by your diet and training.

Want to know the role that supplements play in this car? They’re solid gold pair of balls hanging from the license plate – nice to have but unnecessary, costly and ultimately pretty damn useless.

Supplements are meant to do just that – supplement a solid diet and training program. If you don’t have that base established, no supplement in the world can help you.

Returning to the car example, no matter how many pairs of solid gold balls you have, if you don’t have the actual car to attach them to, now you just look like a silly person carrying around a bunch of solid gold balls for no reason.

At the end of the day ALWAYS look at your diet and training. I’ve trained hundreds of clients and from my own experience with them and myself, 99.99999999% of supplements don’t do a thing but give you a false sense of confidence and progress, taking your money and making your bank account cry tears of agony.

Your bank on supplements

Your bank on supplements

99.999999999999999999999% of your results will come from dialing in your diet and training, aligning them with your goals. Then, and only then, will supplements even potentially, possibly, perhaps add something to the mix, but even then it’s extremely negligible.For muscle gain and fat loss, here are the only supplements I’ll ever recommend to the general trainee, but even then these are in addition to a dialed in diet and training program.1) Creatine Monohydrate (nothing else).

2) Caffeine (because with more energy you’ll train harder, but look at your sleep levels first).

3) A quality protein powder IF you need to boost your protein intake/for convenience, but whole foods trump all powder.

4) Sex. Lots of it. Preferably with someone you really love and care about.*

*don’t pay for this supplement – it defeats the purpose.

That’s it. No fat burners, sprays, wraps, herbal mixes, anything with some fancy name or really awesome charts and graphs on its packaging.

Now if you’re tempted to go spend your hard earned money on supplements that promote building muscle and losing fat at any point within the next 5-75 years, please just deposit that money into my bank account instead, because I will go buy a delicious steak, bite the shit out of it, and praise your name as I absorb its glorious flesh into my body.

Want to make sure that you have your training and nutrition base locked in and directed towards your goals? Click here.

StoneColdMeme

 

How To Use Your Gaming Skills For Fitness Success

RogLawSSJYou’re in an enviable position, like Liam Neeson in Taken (AKA The Greatest Film Of All Time). You have a particular set of skills that make you a force to be reckoned with.

You’re a gamer, and it’s time the world hears you roar.

Life is the ultimate role playing game. Sure, there MIGHT not be dragon, and you MIGHT not be able to effortlessly deliver 9,999 points of damage to your enemies (yet), but much like Cloud, Samus, Master Chief and Lara Croft, you’re the hero of your own story.

Everyday that you wake up is a new chance to use the lessons learned from your experiences to create the future that you desire.

Now here’s the kicker: no one can do this for you. No one can tackle the necessary work required to change your world for the better. Frightening? Maybe. Exciting? You can bet your sweet hit points that it is! As a gamer, you innately understand this. Regardless of the game you play, you’re thrust into the role of the hero, shoes that only you can fill.

The princess (or prince – that’s right, ladies!) is in another castle and you’re their only hope.

This subtle mindset shift, from victim to hero, is what allows gamers to excel at anything we set our minds to, with fitness being custom-made for our particularly awesome skill set.

Enjoy The Grind

When it takes longer to level up, and more challenging to accumulate valuable experience points.

When skills become harder to acquire and progress all but grinds to a depressingly screeching halt.

Welcome to The Grind.

Everyone who has done anything worth doing has come face to face with it, but luckily you’re more familiar than anyone else with this part of the game, and it’s high time you use this to your advantage.

Lifting and nutrition is a battle of attrition, wearing down bad habits, uninspired moments and fighting the natural human urge to look for the path of least resistance (hello McDonald’s drive-thru). If there’s anything I can say with absolute confidence after working with hundreds of clients it’s this: there is no magic bullet.

These things take time, and those who are most successful find a way to enjoy this necessary part of the journey.

Grind

It’s like staring down a long corridor with a giant boss glaring at you dubiously from across the room. The hallway has many doorways, all containing something useful, all serving only as a distraction from your main quest.

No matter what you do, the only way forward is to do the work, to defeat the boss.

The latest fad diet.

The newest workout that promises to adorn you with muscle and cut slabs of fat off like thick-sliced bacon in record time.

Hopping from one program or diet to the next in search of the “secret” that will fast-track your results is just another way of trying to circumvent the grind.

This is where dreams go to die.

This is where many people spin their wheels for months or years on end, not moving any closer to their goal than when they started.

But what about gamers? Not a chance! You know the meaning of hard work and sacrifice, viewing the grind as a necessary part of the path towards completing your quest. You know how to keep your goal the goal. Find what works and milk it for all it’s worth before exploring other options.

With this firmly entrenched in your brain, it’s becomes not a matter of if you’ll reach your destination, but when.

Progress, Rewards And The Pursuit Of Awesomeness

Let’s talk about loot, gear, rewards and treasure.

If you think this whole health and fitness thing has to be head down, powering through difficulty after difficulty until the end of time sort of deal, I invite you to consider another perspective.

As someone who once believed such dogma, this couldn’t be further from the truth, and buying into it can actually make it even more challenging to accomplish great deeds.

Games have a fantastic reward system built into them that we can apply to our own pursuit of happiness. Complete a quest, get a new item. Perform a certain task, unlock a new area of the world. All of these are ways of keeping us motivated and moving forward, focusing our eyes on the proverbial prize and feeling great for doing so.

We play games for the enjoyment that they bring, so why not treat our lives the same way?

LevelUp

Nobody said that this had to suck. Identify an area where you’re struggling and build a quest and reward system around it – you can even draw your own avatar if you’re feeling particularly sassy.  If you’re struggling with getting to the gym, set a weekly or monthly goal for the number of sessions you want to make. Each time you go to the gym, give yourself a certain number of experience points and once you have enough to “level up”, reward yourself.

The same goes for nutrition. Do you usually order fries when you go out to dinner, but this week you subbed them out for veggies a few times? BAM – that’s a win.Treat yourself for new personal records, consistency streaks, and pretty much everything that you can.

The key to success is pushing yourself consistently in small doses that make you slightly uncomfortable. As you get more wins beneath your belt, your confidence in your ability to overcome anything that comes your way grows.

Keep this mantra in mind: as you can do better, do better.

Growth and progress happens in small spurts. Of course it would be daunting as a level 1 noob to step into a level 99 dungeon, but it becomes less so after you work your way up to that point. Every once in awhile you’ll have the opportunity to do something very difficult that will level you up in a big bad way – take these chances whenever you can.

Fail Forward

Dying sucks.

For some, seeing the dreaded “Game Over” screen after several hours of work is enough to make you wanna throw yourself on the floor and flop around like a fish that’s having a seizure. But first, calm down, playa.

Dying means you took a risk.

Failing means that you went for it but didn’t quite make the mark, and that’s perfectly fine.

Game Over

The great thing about failing in game, much like real life, is that you always get a second chance – mistakes aren’t permanent. Using the knowledge gained from your setback, you can jump into the fray and try again, stronger and wiser from your defeat.

If you fall off your diet, identify what happened (was it stress related, poor planning, or just one of those days?) and confidently hop back on, knowing that when the scenario presents itself again you’ll be prepared.

Get Your Hack On

Like Neo dodging bullets in The Matrix or learning kung-fu in 5 seconds, a hack is a way of manipulating your environment to serve your needs by looking for opportunities to make any difficult task less challenging and thus easier to comply with, increasing your chances of long term success. If devices like the Game Genie and Game Shark exist for consoles, then why not apply the same principles to get your sexy on and take control of your health?

Neo Dodge

If you’re constantly running into a wall with your diet because of poor food planning one hack would be choosing 2 days a week where you prep the majority of your food for the week so that you eliminate this issue before it becomes a problem. Another even more awesome, albeit it more costly, way would be to hire a company that prepares and delivers your meals right to your doorstep.

Can’t find the time to make it to the gym? Sit down, find out the reasons why and set up a system that removes a particular barrier from the equation. If you’re always sleeping through your alarm, set 5 of them at different intervals. If you forget to take your gym clothes to work, keep a spare pair in the trunk of your car and in a locker at the gym.

Getting a grip on your health and manipulating how you look and feel through sheer force of will and your own efforts is about as life changing and magical as you can get without a wizard’s wand or gryffin.

You only live once, and when your world is in peril, failure isn’t an option. Suit up and get ready for battle, hero.

Flotation Tank: A Quick & Easy Way To Beat Stress

JREI first heard about the flotation tank (also known as the isolation or sensory deprivation tank) from being a regular listener of the Joe Rogan Experience podcast. As someone looking for ways to better manage stress both from life and the gym, and is always looking for new experiences, I decided to give it a try.

Little known fact: I’m afraid of water AND the dark AND am unreasonably worried about accidentally drowning in the bath tub or a small rain puddle, so I was extremely hesitant about this experience – to this day I haven’t successfully floated in any other body of water.

Thankfully the staff was knowledgeable and friendly enough to answer my questions, one of which was if I would be the first person in the history of the world to go bye bye in the tank, and if so could they make up a way cooler, heroic story to tell my mom, preferably one where I died saving a bus filled with orphaned puppies from a deranged serial killer.

I was shown to the tank and given the preliminaries – session length, what to do in case I panicked or needed help, putting wax inside my ears to prevent water from getting in, etc. Once I was left on my own, I did the only thing that made sense: get nekkid.

Stick with me here. I’m not being creepy.

You can enter the tank in a bathing suit or swimming trunks, but the main benefit is the sensation of nothingness, so if you do that then the feeling of material pressing against or clinging to your skin might take away from the flotation experience, so butt nekkid is the way to go, people.

From there I opened the hatch, descending into darkness, closing the door behind me.

And then there was nothing.

flotation-tank

As a 6 foot tall gentleman of considerable thickness, the inside was spacious enough to allow me to move my body around the tank without feeling too constricted. It did however take awhile for me to stop tensing my body up, preparing for inevitable moment when science failed me and I started to sink. Then came the business of finding the most comfortable resting position: do I go beachside hands-behind-my-head style, or do I cross my arms like I’m a vampire in a coffin waiting for sunset?

My first time was unlike anything I had ever experienced before. No sensation of feeling anything against my skin, no sound and no light; the closest thing that I can liken it to would be meditating while floating on your back through outer space if suddenly all the lights in the universe turned off.

With this physical stimulus gone, the only thing that remained was mental chatter, and there was a ton of it. I thought about what I was going to eat for dinner, if I accidentally forgot to lock my apartment door, if there was anyway that I could become a taste tester for Cinnabon, and if there were any creepy infrared cameras spying on my less-than-presentable dangler.

For the first 10 to 15 minutes, it felt like I was sitting in a room filled with a bunch of people who were having 20 different conversations at the same time and all I wanted to do was tell them to shut their silly faces.

I breathed into my stomach and out my nose at a slow and controlled pace. Once I did, the thoughts started to subside as I focused less on them and more on my breath. After a few minutes of this, I began to experience the most relaxed sense of prolonged peace that I can ever recall having.

Time felt like it was slowing down and speeding up simultaneously; the more relaxed I was, sinking into the experience and letting go of any expectations that I had, the faster time seemed to go. I watched thoughts flow in and out of my head. If one came in that I was particularly interesting to me, I held on to it for a bit and once it was no longer useful to do so I let it go, sending it on it’s merry way.

After what seemed like just a few minutes in this state, I was stirred by a knock on the tank door – my hour was up.

The rest of my day was extremely relaxed. Situations that would’ve annoyed the hell out of me just rolled off my back, and this feeling of “ahhhhhhhhhhh” carried well into the rest of my week.

Each experience is profoundly different. Some sessions I used to surrender and let go of as many thoughts as possible, and others I used as uninterrupted problem solving time for any particular issue I was having.

Even if you just do it once a month, you can’t put a price on an hour of uninterrupted solitude – no voices, no text alerts, no email swooshes or people looking for you to do something for them.

Since making it a regular part of my life, I can’t speak highly enough of this experience. If you’re the type of person who is easily overwhelmed, is filled with anxiety or can’t seem to pull yourself out of “GO GO GO!” mode, you owe yourself to give this a try.

Float Questions

What are the benefits?

To name a few:

  • Quick reduction in stress levels
  • Decrease in stress related pains & anxiety
  • Can help with depression
  • Better sleep
  • Enhanced creativity via shift in brainwave activity
  • Make your skin feel like magic

Where can I find a flotation tank?

There are hundreds of locations worldwide. Here are a few sites you can use to find one in your area.

http://www.floatation.com/wheretofloat.html

http://www.where-to-float.com/

http://floatationlocations.com/where-to-float/

Will I drown?

Nope. Thanks to 800+ lbs of Epsom salt in about 9 inches of water, it’s impossible to drown due to the density of water. The only way I can think of is if you fall asleep and mysteriously flop over onto your stomach…so don’t do that.

Will I run out of air?

Nay. Fresh air is constantly being circulated through the tank. If you feel claustrophobic, you can always get out at any time.

Rog, you got naked. Is it clean in there, or do you now have Ebola?

Quiet, you! You’re required to shower before entering the tank, and the tank is cleaned after each session through a variety of methods to ensure that those nasty microbes don’t live to see the light of day.

How long should I float?

A typical session lasts anywhere from 40 to 90 minutes. You choose the length, and can get out when needed.

Any last words of advice?

Avoid caffeine or other stimulants a few hours before you float, otherwise it can impact your ability to relax. Make sure that you don’t have any open cuts, because this salt is not a game and you will pay dearly for it.

Also, if your eye itches, DO NOT SCRATCH IT!

Audio Lovin

Photo by: Spiros Politis

I’ve done a slew of podcasts over the last few months, so instead of the normal weekly writing I wanted to give your eyes a break and make sweet, sweet audio lovin to your ears.

Full Disclosure Fitness

http://fulldisclosurefitness.com/fdf-episode-061-rog-law-of-rog-law-fitness/

The FitCast

Part 1: http://thefitcast.com/episode-304-roglaws-rules-of-fit-living-part-i

Part 2: http://thefitcast.com/episode-305-roglaws-rules-of-fit-living-part-ii

Fit Smart

This is the podcast that I record with my partner in crime JC Deen.

Our internet home: http://fitsmartcrew.com/

iTunes link: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-fitsmart-podcast/id506717061?mt=2

Muscle For Life

http://www.muscleforlife.com/rog-law-fitness-interview/

The Damian Brown Show

http://www.damianbrown.com/podcast-episode-1-lifes-too-short-not-to-be-awesome

The Kryptonite Report

http://www.kryptonitereport.com/episode-23-with-rog-law-sexification/

The Joe Rogan Experience

The episode in all its glory.

Training Music Bonus

I’ve been known to go to the gym every now and then, and when I do I like to make sure that my ears are thoroughly assaulted by the finest of tunes. Here’s my personal playlist that gets me through my sessions.

The Art of War

Please know that if Beyonce pops up in the middle of a heavy set of squats and you crumble to the ground, questioning everything that you know and love about me, I regret nothing.

Man Wastes Life So You Don’t Have To

I don’t know about you, but I’m very familiar with the occassional sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach that tells me I don’t have any idea what the hell is going on and that I’m just a series of unfortunate events away from going broke and being forced to breed Alpacas while moonlighting as a carny to make ends meet…or at the very least that I’m spending too much time assing around and not doing the things that make feel alive.

Adorable, but ain't nobody got time for that.

Adorable, but ain’t nobody got time for that.

Maybe you haven’t descended into the depths of Alpaca farming that I have, but I’m sure you can relate.

Most of us more or less wrangle this feeling at some point and start to navigate our lives in the direction that we want to go in, making the necessary adjustments along the way. But then there are those that don’t, who let the momentum of the life that they’re living carry them away without any resistance, despite their inner voice telling them to keep fighting the good fighting.

Below is one of those stories via Reddit user JohnJerryson.

A Cautionary Tale

Hi, I my name’s John. I’ve been lurking for a while, but I’ve finally made an account to post this. I need to get my life off my chest. About me. I’m a 46 year old banker and I have been living my whole life the opposite of how I wanted.

All my dreams, my passion, gone. In a steady 9-7 job. 6 days a week. For 26 years. I repeatedly chose the safe path for everything, which eventually changed who I was.

Today I found out my wife has been cheating on me for the last 10 years. My son feels nothing for me. I realised I missed my father’s funeral FOR NOTHING. I didn’t complete my novel, travelling the world, helping the homeless. All these things I thought I knew to be a certainty about myself when i was in my late teens and early twenties. If my younger self had met me today, I would have punched myself in the face. I’ll get to how those dreams were crushed soon.

Let’s start with a description of me when I was 20. It seemed only yesterday when I was sure I was going to change the world. People loved me, and I loved people. I was innovative, creative, spontaneous, risk-taking and great with people. I had two dreams. The first, was writing a utopic/dystopic book.

The second, was travelling the world and helping the poor and homeless. I had been dating my wife for four years by then. Young love. She loved my spontaneity, my energy, my ability to make people laugh and feel loved.

I knew my book was going to change the world. I would show the perspective of the ‘bad’ and the ‘twisted’, showing my viewers that everybody thinks differently, that people never think what the do is wrong. I was 70 pages through when i was 20. I am still 70 pages in, at 46.

By 20, I had backpacking around New Zealand and the Phillipines. I planned to do all of Asia, then Europe, then America (I live in Australia by the way). To date, I have only been to New Zealand and the Phillipines.

Now, we get to where it all went wrong. My biggest regrets. I was 20. I was the only child. I needed to be stable. I needed to take that graduate job, which would dictate my whole life.

To devote my entire life in a 9-7 job. What was I thinking? How could I live, when the job was my life? After coming home, I would eat dinner, prepare my work for the following day, and sleep at 10pm, to wake up at 6am the following day. God, I can’t remember the last time I’ve made love to my wife.

Yesterday, my wife admitted to cheating on me for the last 10 years. 10 years. That seems like a long time, but i can’t comprehend it. It doesn’t even hurt. She says it’s because I’ve changed. I’m not the person I was. What have I been doing in the last 10 years? Outside of work, I really can’t say anything. Not being a proper husband. Not being ME.

Who am I? What happened to me? I didn’t even ask for a divorce, or yell at her, or cry. I felt NOTHING. Now I can feel a tear as I write this. But not because my wife has been cheating on me, but because I am now realising I have been dying inside.

What happened to that fun-loving, risk-taking, energetic person that was me, hungering to change the world? I remember being asked on a date by the most popular girl in the school, but declining her for my now-wife. God, I was really popular with the girls in high school. In university/college too. But i stayed loyal. I didn’t explore. I studied everyday.

Remember all that backpacking and book-writing I told you about? That was all in the first few years of college. I worked part-time and splurged all that I had earned. Now, I save every penny. I don’t remember a time I spend anything on anything fun. On anything for myself. What do I even want now?

My father passed ten years ago. I remember getting calls from mom, telling me he was getting sicker and sicker. I was getting busier and busier, on the verge of a big promotion. I kept putting my visit off, hoping in my mind he would hold on. He died, and I got my promotion. I haven’t seen him in 15 years.

When he died, I told myself it didn’t matter what I didn’t see him. Being an atheist, I rationalized that being dead, it wouldn’t matter anyway. WHAT WAS I THINKING? Rationalizing everything, making excuses to put things off. Excuses. Procrastination. It all leads to one thing, nothing. I rationalized that financial security was the most important thing.

I now know, that it definitely is not. I regret doing nothing with my energy, when I had it. My passions. My youth. I regret letting my job take over my life. I regret being an awful husband, a money-making machine.

I regret not finishing my novel, not travelling the world. Not being emotionally there for my son. Being a damn emotionless wallet.

If you’re reading this, and you have a whole life ahead of you, please. Don’t procrastinate. Don’t leave your dreams for later. Relish in your energy, your passions. Don’t stay on the internet with all your spare time (unless your passion needs it).

Please, do something with your life while your young. DO NOT settle down at 20. DO NOT forget your friends, your family. Yourself. Do NOT waste your life. Your ambitions. Like I did mine. Do not be like me.

Courtesy of Colin Wright

Courtesy of Colin Wright

This is your life and no one else is responsible for what you do with it. If there’s something that you want to do but have been putting off for any number of reasons, make some progress towards it, no matter how small,  NOW.

Join a gym, send that e-mail you’ve been talking about doing, take an exercise class, buy a recipe book and cook a meal even if it ends up tasting like a toxic shoe. Do anything you can to throw a wrench in the mechanical cog of momentum.

If you don’t, no one else will.

How To Take Charge Of Your Motivation

Photo By Lee Scott

From world leaders to authors and movie stars, we all have these moments of blah. Motivation can be a fickle and elusive force, leaving us wondering if we really want the things that we set out to achieve.

One moment you’re on top of the world, moving towards your goals, cutting through tasks with ninja-like speed and accuracy, and then the next you’re derailed, unmotivated and left wondering how it all fell apart so quickly.

Luckily, it doesn’t have to be this way. You have the necessary tools to harness this seemingly magical force, using it to your advantage whenever the situation demands, and it all starts with reconnecting with the ball of awesome that is you.

What’s Your Story?

Photo credit: Myung Jung Kim/PA Wire

Bruce Wayne became Batman after the death of his parents.

Peter Parker became Spiderman after that whole radioactive spider biting him thing went down.

Bruce Lee’s training and philosophy changed dramatically due to the outcome of a fight he had with a rival martial artist.

On a less heroic note, we both come from vastly different backgrounds. JC was an athlete growing up and was introduced to strength training early on. Rog, on the other hand, grew up a gamer and didn’t pick up a barbell until he was in his 20s.

We’re all a bundle of unique stories. Use it to your advantage.

Psychologically they’re an amazing tool for creating lasting change because you have a pool of experiences to draw from – everything up until this very moment is at your disposal. It represents the switch, that moment when your life begins to shift in a fundamental way away from both where you came from and where you are towards where you want to be.

This is just the beginning, however. The real ingredient behind getting your motivational engine started and keeping it running amidst the occasional stats and stops is connecting your story to a powerful why.

Unabashedly Choose Your Goal

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Want to find a simple, no-fuss way to manage your diet and training yet well-meaning people keep piling complication upon complication on you?

What if you just want to look great naked yet are constantly talked into trying methods that aren’t bringing you any closer to inspiring shock and awe when you jumped out of that birthday cake in your birthday suit?

Your goal is yours and yours alone – don’t let anyone hijack it.

It doesn’t have to appeal to the sensibilities of anyone else but yourself. In the end you’re going to be the one making the necessary sacrifices and doing the work needed to get there, so making sure that you’re physically and emotionally invested first is key

Write It Down

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Scribble it on a napkin, put it in a word document or carve it into a tree if you’re feeling a bit old school. The mission here is to write it down, getting it out of your head and bringing it into the real world.

When you own your goal like this, you set the stage of success in two important ways.

First, it forces you to make a decision. By putting pen to pad (or fingers to keyboard), you’ve said in a tangible way that this is what you want. Doing this not only makes your goal more real, but it also serves as a beacon, directing your internal GPS towards Awesomeville. You can’t hit what you can’t see.

You don’t need to know exactly how you’ll get there yet. Right now this is enough to get you going.

Secondly, it narrows your vision. Choices become a lot easier to make. What you do either leads you closer towards your goal or it doesn’t. By knowing what to say yes to, you also identify what you need to say no to as well.

Instead of getting distracted and led astray by every shiny thing along the way, you’re able to stay focused on the things that will bring you the most value and results for your time invested. In the great words of the sage and philosopher Mr. T, you cut out all the unnecessary jibba-jabba.

Pass The “Vanilla Ice” Test

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In the mid 90s, rapper Vanilla Ice was allegedly held upside down over a balcony by a record executive who threatened to drop him unless he came up with a few million dollars. True or not, this actually has a lot to do finding your own motivation.

And if you don’t know who Vanilla Ice is, I’m not sure if I feel sad for your soul, or jealous that I’ll never again be as pure and innocent as you are right now.

When it comes to our goals, we often have what’s considered a base reason. We want to get in shape, be strong, lose some weight, feel good, be healthy or a host of other generic answers.

Many times our analysis of what we want goes no further than this, and because of it we set our chances of success incredibly low right from the start.

Put yourself in Ice’s shoes. Imagine someone holding you over a balcony ready to drop unless you told them why you want to achieve your goals, do you think you’d give them some of the baseline answers from above?

If so think again, because it’s a long way down.

Friedrich Nietzsche said that he who has a strong enough why can bear any how. This is critical as you’ll undoubtedly encounter resistance and setbacks along the way to achieving anything worthwhile. If your why isn’t built on a solid foundation of personal meaning on an emotional level, it becomes far easier to abandon your goal whenever difficulties arise.

Your why will serve as the kindle for your fire during times of doubt.

Do you want to feel more confident & comfortable in your own skin?

Do you want to be able to play with your children as much as their little hearts desire?

Do you want to stay healthy so as not to end up like a loved one who died far too soon due to not taking care of themselves?

Do you want to feel more attractive to and have more sex with your partner?

We can’t answer this question for you – it’s up to you to fill in the blank. As long as your reasons are true to yourself and get you absolutely excited about pursuing your goal, resonating with something deep inside of yourself, you’ve passed the test.

Action Precedes Motivation

We’re going to touch more on this in the habit module, but wanted to leave you with this idea. When was the last time you felt motivated?

When was the last time you had that aha moment or spark to get going only to have it fade away within a day or two. It feels extremely easy to act when we are motivated, but it’s fairly difficult to act when we’re not.

So how do we combat this? It’s worth stating that you’re never going to be completely moitvated all the time. If you are, we’d like some of your secret sauce. The main thing that separates those who could stuff done, and those who don’t are the ones who don’t rely on motivation to act.

So, even if you don’t feel like doing something, it’s better to act out of knowing what you want your outcome to look like, rather than waiting for more motivation.

Use Past Mistakes To Fuel Future Success

If this is your first foray into pursuing a fitness or health goal, we envy you – you’re about to learn a ton about yourself in the process.

If you’ve been around the block a few times and still haven’t achieved what you’re looking for, chances are you’ve encountered the same personal road blocks over and over again.

Instead of viewing mistakes as failures that offer you nothing, change your perspective and see them for what they are – ways that simply didn’t work. By knowing what don’t work, it frees you up to learn from them and focus on finding ways that do.

You can also reach out to people who’ve accomplished what you’re looking to do and ask them what pitfalls they encountered along the way. It may seem intimidating at first, but odds are they’ll be more than willing to help someone who is in a position they were themselves once in.

When you’re in uncharted goal territory, it helps to have a partial road map pieced together from both your personal experiences and those of others who’ve been successful.

As you get better at bouncing back better and wiser from your setbacks, jumping into the fray once again, the process becomes more enjoyable. Refine your course as necessary and let the process itself, not the reward you seek, become its own reward.

With this mindset firmly in place, it’s not a matter of if you’ll reach your goal, but when.

“Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.” – Winston Churchill

The Great Comparison Hoax

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Death by a thousand cuts.

Luckily I don’t mean a literal death, since that’s the least anabolic activity of all time and would surely negatively impact your gains. The death I’m speaking of is more sinister, capable of covering your otherwise great life with a general malaise that seems unshakable.

Most of us know objectively that to compare ourselves to others is an exercise in futility. We’re emotional creatures, and logic and rational thinking get drop kicked right out of the window when it comes to our wants and desires.

When it comes to how we look, how strong we are, how fast we’re progressing and everything in between, our emotions can push our rational minds out of the driver’s seat, take the wheel, and drive us straight towards Crazyville.

Like sticking a fork into an electrical socket, or taking a 3 hour nap while you’re cooking a steak in an oven (I’m not alone in the last one…right?), comparing ourselves to others is more often than not a horrible idea that no good can come from.

Much like a moth drawn to the flame, we just can’t help ourselves. None of us are truly immune to it.

Our Behind-The-Scenes VS Their Highlight Reel

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We’re with ourselves 24/7, and as a result we know more about us than any outside observer would; our motivations, goals and hot button issues. When we go into comparison mode, our brain wrangles up those demons and throws them right back into our faces, completely unfiltered.

The problem is that we aren’t comparing our demons to someone else’s – we’re pitting them against only what we can see on the surface, and given that people typically put their best foot forward in the public, this is rarely an accurate portrait of the situation.

Imagine yourself doing all that you can to get results in the gym. You’re logging your workouts, keeping track of your calories and nutrients, making time to prepare your meals when you would love nothing more than to ease up on the reigns just a little bit.

Then one day you see someone working out there with a physique that you would sell your first born child for, casually strolling through their session. And here’s what kicks you right in the junk: they’re eating a candy bar post workout.

All of a sudden, your inner comparison beast busts loose.

Why do they look like that and I don’t? They clearly don’t work as hard as I do. I train hard ERRYday. #BeastMode #NoDaysOff #AnotherRidiculousHashtagHere.

 I take my nutrition way more seriously and here they are eating a candy bar, looking like they just walked off the set of a photo shoot.

But you don’t know the full story. You don’t know what they sacrificed to get there, or anything about them. All you have to go off is this brief snapshot in time, and it’s easy for the comparing mind to take that and create a vivid picture that’s far from reality.

Getting caught in this trap can cause you to do things you otherwise wouldn’t do. I’m talking constant program hopping, ridiculous diets, setting unrealistic time frames for yourself, and setting out on a never-ending quest searching for “the secret”.

Our worst vs their best. Our inside vs their outside. It’s always a losing battle.

Welcome To The Black Hole Of Suck

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The appetite of a black hole is insatiable, feeding off of everything around it. When it comes to comparisons, this is the exact scenario that we find ourselves in – and it will drain your life dry if you let it.

In this mode, nothing is ever enough. You constantly feel inferior.

You’re never strong, because someone else is stronger.

You never feel truly feel comfortable in your skin, because someone is always leaner, has bigger biceps or more ab definition.

You aren’t making progress fast enough, because someone is always achieving more in a shorter amount of time.

Comparison feeds off of these types of thoughts., and it never ends.

I once dated a woman whose ex boyfriend was a UFC fighter. After a quick Google search to find out who he was, I went from being completely happy with my development and progress to feeling like Captain America pre-Soldier Serum.

Here I am, a guy who works out 3x a week, loves to eat ice cream by the pint, enjoys a good marathon video game session and more often than not falls asleep to a YouTube video because I stayed up way too late clicking my way through the internet rabbit hole, comparing myself to an Olympic champion with ungodly genetics who trains more hours in a week than I do in a single month and makes a living training to punch a hole through the soul of other elite athletes in front of thousands of people.

If I were looking for a recipe to help make myself feel like hot diggity dog shit, I hit the nail right on the head.

By constantly sucking in all of this outside stimuli without any filter, letting it bombard our inner world, all we do is diminish our own accomplishments, taking the wind out of our sails for no good reason.

The Only Way To Slay The Comparison Beast

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To be forewarned is to be forearmed.

The act of comparing may never really go away, but you can turn the tide in your favor.

When you notice in the moment that you’re falling victim to this mindset, stop immediately before the thoughts build any momentum.

Take a deep breath and relax. By doing this, you go from being reactionary to proactive, creating space to decide what you’re going to do next with the information you have.

This may sound woo woo as all hell, but give it a try. Your breath (that thing that keeps you alive) is intimately connected to controlling how you feel in any given moment.

Is your training partner progressing faster than you? Great – there’s something that you can learn from them. Maybe you won’t have the same results as them for a host of reasons, but if nothing else it shows you a vision of what is possible, and you can bring that energy and excitement to your workouts.

There will always be someone better than you out there, but at the end of the day it doesn’t matter. All that you can focus on and truly control is the effort that you bring to the task.

You’re the only person that you need to compare yourself to, and only to check-in and make sure that you’re improving at a rate that’s acceptable for you and your goals.

When this is the focus, what others are doing becomes irrelevant.

Let me be clear. I’m not saying that you can’t look at what others are doing and using that as fuel to push yourself forward.

Sometimes seeing others making progress towards their goals can be a healthy gut check for you, allowing you to reconnect and give yourself an honest assessment as to if you’re playing it safe or if you have more to give.

For others it does more harm than good. It’s like fire: you can use it to warm up your house or burn it to the ground. The devil is in the details, and it will take time to learn when to push forward and when to be kinder to yourself and pull back a bit.

Instead letting the accomplishments of others feel like a slight towards you, use them to build yourself up. Choose to be inspired by what others are doing, no longer making yourself the victim of outside forces, and tap into a constantly renewable source of motivation and energy – yourself.

Game Of Bones: 3 Ways To Crush Stiffness And Prepare Your Body For Battle (AKA Life)

Photo Credit: dot-dashlee

Today’s guest article is brought to you by the awesome Kate Galliett – enjoy!

It was a dark and stormy night. The candles had been lit and were flickering, casting dancing shadows against the stone walls. I, Kate Galliett, Queen of the land of Fit For Real Life, had settled in for an evening of movement studying & wine drinking. There was a knock at my door.

“Who’s there?”

“Tis I, Rog Law of House Cinnabon.”

Rog entered my castle with a look of despair on his face.

“M’lady, I am troubled.”

“What is the matter Sir Rog? Is there trouble at the Wall?”

“No . It’s much worse than that. It’s my people. They are being crushed by an unseen force! It’s said to be called “21st century living”. Have you heard of this thing? Their bodies are breaking down. I know I have what they need to be confident, sexy mo-fos, but I fear all will be lost if they lose the ability to move freely and without restriction!

I’ve come to ask your help. Please Lady Kate, join forces with me and help the good people of the Land of Sexification to move better, feel better, and be better.”

I sensed myself shift into battle-mode.

“Sir Rog, I only hope it is not too late. Come quickly, we must get to work drawing up battle plans immediately to fight the crushing force that is ‘21st century living’.”

What follows is what was born out of that dark, stormy evening.

These are the very best recommendations I could give to Sir Rog to help his people – you – to save yourself from the darkest of forces, that which sucks the life of you; unnecessary aches, pains, and injuries caused by modern-lifestyles which grind us into the ground if we aren’t actively working to fend it off and become truly unbreakable humans.

Commit To Practice Time Every Day 

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Do you think master swordsman, Syrio, teacher to young Arya Stark of the much-loved Stark Family of Kings’ Landing, became a master by practicing only on occasion? No-sir-ee-bob. He also would never have said “no-sir-ee-bob”.

The point is, by not actively working to improve your mobility, you’re actively allowing the sub-par soft-tissue quality and movement-capacity to remain. You don’t become a master overnight. You don’t become a master in 30 days. Depending on how long you’ve been carrying around soft tissue that is tight, rigid, and otherwise not bend-y, it might take a fair chunk of time to get your body moving fluidly again.

Start looking for opportunities to interject mobility work into your day. You will often catch me stretching the soft tissue of my well-worn gymnastics hands into the table, the steering wheel, the floor if I’m sitting on it…because I know, that if I reserve soft-tissue work for just once a week, my hands will be incapacitated, locked up from all of the strain that gymnastics and rock climbing puts on them.

Wherever you need to improve your soft-tissue quality, you must seek out ways to do that in your day. It could mean digging your foot into a lacrosse ball in the morning as you brush your teeth. It could mean standing up every hour at work and finding a doorway to stretch your chest out in.

Commit to it. Commit to yourself.

Do Your Research And Know Your Weak Spots

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If you’re about to be double-crossed by the Kings’ Hand, it would serve you well to know ahead of time. But to do so, you’ve got to be looking below the surface of what you’re being told.

For example, if your IT Band is aching and hurting, your IT Band is fooling you into thinking that it is the cause of the issue. It’s not that things are never as they seem, sometimes, the IT Band truly is causing an issue – BUT – more often than not, the pain in the IT Band is coming from a root issue that lies elsewhere.

Here are a few reasons why the IT Band can be painful:

– The hips are unstable (read: weak) and the IT Band is trying to do the work of the other hip muscles.

– The glutes are weak, and when the glutes are weak that is a whole bunch of effort that has to be moved to other parts of the lower body, and the IT Band won’t be escaping the extra work load even though it will hate every second of it.

– Your running form is poor. Not everyone likes to run. But some people do. And those who do would be well-served to run with good form. Because anything done with poor form is just plain poor son.

– There’s an insane amount of “run form techniques” out there, but a simple one that easily moves you into better run form is hill running. The incline doesn’t allow you to over-stride, and you will automatically land more forefoot on the hill as you run up it. The grassy surface is a bonus! PS – just walk down, lest you be the fool who trips and goes rolling the rest of the day down.

– Your shoes are selling you out. No need to go crazy with minimalist shoes unless you’re into that sort of thing, but, when you have tight shoes on that don’t let your feet articulate with the ground very well (or at all), your foot becomes weaker, and in time that will negatively affect the stability of your knee. The IT Band inserts just below the knee, so what is happening with the knee, will eventually affect the IT Band as well.

Become The Leader Of Your Body

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(Writers’ note: there is a long-standing battle between myself & Rog Law regarding which man is better and obviously the answer to that is “Rob Stark”, but Mr Lawson feels that “Jon Snow” is our winner here, and yet we remain friends proving that friendship can be built despite fundamental differences of opinion.)

Rob Stark may be a young man still as he unites an army of men behind him as they engage in conflict with the Lannisters’ army, but unite them he does. (No need to lead your body into a Red Wedding though…ain’t nobody got time for that shit.)

It’s time to stop letting achy joints & injured bodies decide what your life-agenda is going to be.

How many things have you put off because your body was telling you “hey, we hurt”?

How much longer are you going to let the Lannisters rule your….oh, sorry, got carried away there for a sec. Your body, how long are you going to let your body decide whether you do ‘more’ or ‘less’ with life?

You, as a human, have the capability to do anything your mind and heart desires. But, you want your body to be physically capable of doing it, or else, those things you wish to do will remain but fantasies in your mind.

Here are 3 things you must do if you want to lead your body to glorious victory:

Get mobile. You need your soft-tissue to be pliable and move-able. If it’s not, your joints will take extra wear & tear, which not only hurts, but it also wears them down faster.

Get connected to your body. Don’t get lost in fitness by only looking at measurable things. There is value in looking to hard-to-quantify, but absolutely legit things like the mind-body connection (or to give you a ‘non-hippie’ term: proprioception & kinesthetic awareness).

Get your foundation strong. Strength training doesn’t just strengthen your muscles – it also strengthens every part of your skeleton, and having a strong structure means less risk of breaking the structure. Build the base of the structure strong and mighty and you’re going to have a structure that is durable for a lifetime of adventures.

Sexification Note: Earlier this year, Kate created a 12 week program to help people re-connect with their bodies while ridding themselves of nagging pains and annoying stiffness. I personally use Kate’s resource because I move as well as a hippo riding a skateboard and feel way too old before my time. Since it’s helping me get my groove back and then some, I want to pass it along to you as well.

Click here to learn how to free yourself from stiffness and random pains.

An Open Letter to People Struggling to Exercise

It’s hard to ignore, isn’t it?

That pulling sensation from somewhere deep inside. While the origin is unknown, this isn’t the first time that this feeling has crept up on you.

Maybe it was the game you watched. Seeing the athletes move their bodies with a sense of purpose, all towards a single objective, trigged your own desire to step into the arena.

It could’ve been that couple that ran past you, laughing with each other as they quickly changed from full-sized humans into tiny specks in the distance. You haven’t gone on a walk in awhile, and on any given day a set of stairs can leave you more winded than you care to admit. It feels like a finger thump straight to your heart.

Or perhaps it hit you as you flipped through the magazine in the checkout lane. On the cover, some “fit” model with abs for days. Page 26: lean legs and a butt that could stop a speeding bullet without so much as a flex.

Regardless of the source, the cause is the same. Your higher self, your own personal version of Jiminy Cricket, your inner voice (mind sounds like DMX, in case you were wondering), is throwing anything it can at you, trying to get you to pay attention to one thing: you’re not firing on all cylinders.

I’ve Been There Too

Back in the not too distant past, I was about as unhealthy as you could get.

Outside of organized sports until I was 12, moving around just wasn’t my thing. I took full advantage of every possible opportunity to lie down, sit in a chair or lean against a conveniently placed wall.

Exercise? Nope – it made me breath too hard. Then I’d sweat too much, which means I’d need more showers, which would cause me to run out of workout clothes, forcing me to continuously buy new ones. You can clearly see how if i kept exercising it would only lead to my financial ruin.

And eating healthy? French fries are technically a vegetable, and scientists have managed to cram every vitamin, mineral and nutrient that I need be a fully functioning human into chicken nuggets, so I didn’t need to bother with eating that green stuff.

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Does not include cash purchases or eating friends leftovers.

Lengthy gaming sessions that stretched from dusk till dawn were the norm. Food that I could buy and eat in five minutes or less became my main source of sustenance.

At 20, after years of these kinds of shenanigans, it’s no wonder that I slept horribly, was in a constant state of lethargy, had cholesterol levels over 350 and suffered from a boner that was as dependable as a narcoleptic security guard.

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Certified sex machine.

Looking to do something (pretty much anything) to turn things around, I stumbled my way into fitness thanks to a series of random events, and it sent my life in an entirely new direction.

The Benefits

You’ll probably live longer. Even if you don’t, your quality of life will undoubtedly be better when compared to doing nothing.

You’ll have less fat and more muscle, all contributing to a leaner you. Clothes will fit better.

You’ll be more resistant to random injuries and the normal wear and tear of life. Slipping on ice in the winter time is no longer an instant death sentence.

Everyday life become easier because you’re stronger and more prepared for the tasks.

Exercise can serve as a new outlet for your aggression, sadness, or simply become a way to wrangle and process your thoughts better. Empowerment is just one workout away.

You’ll have more energy and an increased sense of self-confidence, not only from your appearance changing, but from the act of pursuing a goal.

Less stress, sharper brain function and an increased sense of creativity all await you. Your sex life will be better too because you’re more aware of and connected to your body – hollaaaaaaa.

You’ll be better able to modulate your energy. Like a DJ doing their DJ thing (like Jon Snow, I know nothing), you’ll know your levels at all times, whether you’re giving a task your all, have a little more in the tank, or you’re just coasting. And you can adjust your faders – is that what they’re called? – accordingly.

Here’s the rub: it takes time & consistency for all of these benefits to come to fruition. The sooner you make peace with this fact, the smoother your ride will be.

I completely get the urge to want it all right NOW. I was there, too. I was stunned when my biceps didn’t explode through my Kmart t-shirt after my first curl, and my back didn’t grow wide enough to block out the Sun when I did my first chin up. You mean I have to come back tomorrow and do this whole exercise thing AGAIN?!

Yup.

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Do Something. Anything.

Do what you like. Yoga, running, weight lifting, break dancing or chasing ducks through the park like a crazy person. In the beginning, it really doesn’t matter.

If you’re new to exercise, pick something and get moving just to get the ball rolling. Remove as much friction as you possibly can between you and starting.

Do you need to have a solid plan when starting out? Not at all. Don’t let perfect become the enemy of good enough for the time being – you’ll learn what you need to along the way, refining your aim as you progress. Plus you’ll likely change course plenty of times as you figure out what’s important to you and what isn’t.

One of my first fitness fails was a run in the middle of winter wearing sweatpants, a hoodie, gym shoes and construction gloves because I just finished watching a Rocky montage. I slipped and bruised my tailbone and I gingerly limped my way back across campus while holding my buttcheeks in shame.

Sign Up For The Journey, Not The Destination

Some are motivated by the drive to succeed while others get pumped up when they’re trying their best not to lose. You may be someone who is motivated by outside rewards, or you forge ahead based on intrinsic factors. No matter which camp you more or less identify with, tap into your motivation style.

There’s no judgement on where you fall. This is a marathon, not a sprint. To avoid burnout, find something that you enjoy about the process outside of the end goal you’re looking to achieve. Regardless of where you want to go, the distance between point A and point Z is going to take time, and you can run yourself ragged grinding as fast as you can towards the finish line without actually enjoying anything along the way.

It’s like someone on a quest to make a million dollars. They can either become so focused on the destination that they only experience any kind of joy once they hit their goal, or they can create mini check points & rewards along the way, specific to how they roll, to keep them excited and make the road to dolla dollas far more enjoyable.

Abs Are Overrated

Last year I hired a coach and spent a few months dieting down for a photo shoot, something that I always wanted to do for the hell of it. I set the of goal of becoming leaner than I had ever been, and 20 pounds later I achieved just that.

And I was happy. For like 5.6 seconds in total.

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Mainly I was just hungry and I wanted cake.

That’s the thing nobody really tells you. Once you reach your coveted destination, the victory is short-lived and before you know it your brain is already focusing the next shiny object.

I wasn’t any happier when I reached complete ab-domination, but when I started I sure thought that I would be. That’s when I realized that it’s not necessarily about the goal that you pick, but more about what your goal represents, who you become in the process and the traits that you develop along the way.

Even if you don’t completely hit your target, you’ll still learn a ton in the process. Sometimes a goal isn’t meant to be hit, but it gives you something to aim at for the time being.

As tempting as it is to try and fix inside issues with outside solutions, don’t. You’re enough as is right now. Instead of aiming to fix yourself, or thinking that you’ll be happier once you have X, adopt the mindset that you’re just making upgrades to an already awesome design.

Work from the inside out, not the other way around.

You’re Gonna Mess Up

A lot.

Years later you’ll look back on the major fails made along the way and laugh at yourself, wondering if your brain was hijacked by aliens who controlled your body, making it do silly things for their enjoyment.

It’s part of the game, so chalk it up as nothing but feedback designed to help you learn, grow, and spin your wheels less in the future.

Don’t add unnecessary pressure by locking yourself into some arbitrary deadline from the start. Chances are it’ll be unrealistic to begin with anyway. This whole exercise thing is like a giant carousel. When you inevitably goof up, fall off your intended path or things don’t go as planned, don’t flip out – the next chance to make things right is moments ago.

Ready? Take a deep breath and get ready for a wild ride. I have no idea where you’ll end up, but I promise that it will change your life if you let it.

“You have exactly one life in which to do everything you’ll ever do. Act accordingly.” – Colin Wright